Late breaking news...

So here's what's happening in my life:

1. I broke up with Melanie.

2. I was offered a full time lecturing position with the Ohio State University Statistics Department.

I have thought long and hard about it and I've decided to take the job. I can work full time and take classes casually to work towards my Ph.D. I really like the faculty at OSU and they seem to like me. It is virtually unprecidented for someone with "only" a masters degree to be offered a full time lecturing position, so I am extremely honored by their high consideration of me.

I know that I told most of you I was going to move back to Minnesota, but this opportunity is too good to pass up. As a small consolation, I'll be able to afford more trips back.
You all are, of course, always welcome to come visit me.

So that's that.

Good Night, And Good Luck.

I just finished watching Good Night, And Good Luck. I saw it in the theater as well, and after this viewing I was as moved as the first time.
I was moved by the eloquence and integrity of Mr. Murrow. I was moved by the strength and resolve of his team and by the bravery shown by all involved. I turned off the film and thought about the media of the 21st century. I thought of organizations like Fox News whose slogan "We report, you decide." is as bitter as it is ironic. I thought of all those persecuted by tyrants who try to make synonymous the words "dissenting" and "disloyal." Lastly, I thought of our current administration whose foreign and domestic policy seems to be based on a teleological suspension of the ethical. Watching a simple press conference leaves me stultified, pondering how lies can be told so audaciously, doublespeak used so frequently, and fear harnessed so effectively that we, the american public, applaud and approve of our own subjugation.
But the message of the film was not despair. It was, in fact, hope. Hope that even one who is attacked from on high has the right and ability to defend himself. That those who brandish their authority are not indisputable and not immune to the power of reason. Those who use deception and misinformation as weapons will ultimately find themselves impotent against the avatars of truth.

-SP

&pi

Hi Everyone! First of, let me say that I love you all. Second of all let me say that I baked a chocolate pie (pictured below).


Third, and last of all, let me show you a picture of my car. It's a ford focus zx5. I love her. She takes me all the way. I'm thinking about naming her Evelyn (Evie for short). Any ideas for alternative names?

I still haven't named my motorcycle.

Holidays

Well, the holidays have come and gone. I started my new job working as a lecturer at Columbus State Community College (www.cscc.edu). It's going really well so far. I like teaching. I'd like to thank all my buddies who housed, fed, and entertained me in MN. In particular thanks to mr. and mrs. Fast Eddie and mr. and mrs. Gubbins.

Peace and Love

Sprocketplug

'Tis the season

...to bake cookies with Melanie.








hmmmm...delicious.

By the Power of Grayskull

Well. That's it. I got my Degree. It's a Masters of Statistics.

I don't feel any different. Maybe it's one of those things that kind of sneaks up on you and you don't really realize you've passed one of life's milestones until you look back and say "hey, that was nifty." Like when I lost my virginity to a mechanical bull. Or like when Alex went back in time and brought technology to the Japanese to give them the edge over the allies in WWII. Luckily, the TimeCops caught him in the nick of time, and the allied forces won the day.
Do we have a clip from that?
....no?
....o.k. i thought we had a clip.

Small Victories by P.E.S.

Small Victories


I didn’t think of you yesterday.
A fact which makes me quite proud.
A small victory.
A step towards recovery from Eros’s poisoned arrow.
I didn’t think of the soft click
made by the worn metal latch
As you closed the door for the last time.
I didn’t think of the delirium
Created by your hands and searing lips
The madness and desperation with which our bodies merged.
I have been waiting for this day
The day I could write this poem.
Waiting for the macrophage of Forget to
gnaw away pieces of your tumorous love.
My patience has been rewarded,
And these words serve as a nepenthe.
A record of triumph.
A prayer made of dry grass


-PES

time frame

Well, I'm sorry to dissapoint all my Minnesota friends, but I won't be moving back as soon as I thought. I haven't been able to find a job and the stress of packing, moving, finding a job and an apartment seemed to daunting for the 2 and a half weeks I had left on my lease. So I renewed for 6 months.
I'm going to look for temporary jobs here while I keep looking for employment in MN.
Meanwhile I have a question to ask you all:

Some phrase popped into my head last night and I cannot remember the origins. Some girl was about to get into bed with some guy and he says to her, "Don't worry. I give you the 'no bone' guarantee."
I can't remember if this is an Olaf quote or a Red Wing High School quote. Can anyone help me out?

Peace,

SP

i'll give YOU a second derivative

In Stat773 we are working on different computational methods to solve integrals. Anyway, Chris Hans is lecturing away and at one point he starts to talk about stochastic processes and the like. I have never had a class in this material so I was more than a little lost. At one point I raise my hand and say:

"Are all Markov chains that have limiting distributions Ergodic by definition? ...I'm sorry, I have no idea what I just asked."

Which was funny to me and my classmates, and entirely genuine, I assure you. Perhaps I've been in school so long I can ask a fairly pertinent question without knowing what the hell I'm talking about.

ever after

"Cinderella's Diary" by Ron Koertge, from Fever. © Red Hen Press.
Reprinted without [sic] permission

Cinderella's Diary

I miss my stepmother. What a thing to say
but it's true. The prince is so boring: four
hours to dress and then the cheering throngs.
Again. The page who holds the door is cute
enough to eat. Where is he once Mr. Charming
kisses my forehead goodnight?

Every morning I gaze out a casement window
at the hunters, dark men with blood on their
boots who joke and mount, their black trousers
straining, rough beards, callused hands, selfish,
abrupt ...

Oh, dear diary—I am lost in ever after:
Those insufferable birds, someone in every
room with a lute, the queen calling me to look
at another painting of her son, this time
holding the transparent slipper I wish
I'd never seen.

so close, yet so far away

So, Julie Legler called me today and told me that the original applicant for the teaching position at St. Olaf has decided (against all odds) to take the position, thus usurping yours truly. She told me that they could guarantee me a spot for next fall... but I think I should forgo that invitation and start looking elsewhere for gainful employment. I mean, I would love to work at Olaf, but I also would love to be able to feed myself in the months interim. Ah well.
So, here's the rub. If any of you lovely Minnesotan people hear of a job befitting a Master of Statistics please let me know.
For points of clarification:
A Master of Statistics is not uniquely qualified to

1. wait tables
   
2. sell bodily fluids for money
   
3. dig ditches
   
4. be a live in nanny with a british accent and a scathing wit
   
5. design, build, or maintain weapons of mass destruction
   
6. breed show dogs
   

Thank you very much.

Farm Wife by R.S. Thomas

Hers is the clean apron, good for fire
Or lamp to embroider, as we talk slowly
In the long kitchen, while the white dough
Turns to pastry in the great oven,
Sweetly and surely as hay making
In a June meadow; hers are the hands,
Humble with milking, but still now
In her wide lap as though they heard
A quiet music, hers is the voice
That coaxes time back to the shadows
In the rooms corners.
O, hers is all
This strong body, the safe island
Where men may come, sons and lovers,
Daring the cold seas of her eyes.

I passed

So, i found out my results yesterday. My friend, Shari, and I had planned on going out to eat that evening (and I wasn't expecting my results until thursday) so we went out anyway to celebrate. We went to Don Pablo's and I drank a daqueri that had to be 100 fluid ounces. let's see if I can find a picture. no luck, though I find the correct spelling of daiquiri. Anyway, Shari tells Sean, our server, that it's my birthday. Being an honest Puck, I tell him it's not my birthday, but in fact I have just passed my master's examination. He says "hell, we'll sing for you anyway." So after our meal, which passed with much delightful conversation, they came out clapping and singing. I stumbled out of the booth, stood on a chair, and outstretched my arms. (because I just HATE being the center of attention). So they sing, Happy Masters to You and I get a round of applause. Much fun.
Anyway, I got home, made a bunch of phone calls and then someone walks in my front door. it's Jeremy, Joanne, and Michael, carrying a bunch of beers and visibly intoxicated (not Joanne, the DD). So they tell me they passed, I tell them I pass, I chug one of their beers and we go across the street to Damon's where we proceed to drink at an alarming rate (*editor's note: Peter was already more than a little intoxicated before going to Damon's). so i get home at i dunno, no later than 12:00am and....now's a good time to mention, i still feel a little drunk...so i was thinking about going to bed, but every time I closed my eyes I felt the world vacillate at an alarming rate. so i put in The Princess Bride and watched it. I ended up staying up 'til about 2 or 3, when I felt like I wasn't going to toss my proverbial cookies. and now I'm awake. it's nine a.m. EST and I'm still feeling a little tipsy. I guess I won't be riding my motorcycle into school today.
So, thank you to all who have wished me well, and for those who have wished me harm: TAKE THAT BITCHES!

your friend,
The Plug

Nos morituri

Well,

it went o.k.
I won't know the results until next Thursday. I know that I did better than last year, but whether or not it's enough to pass is beyond me.
Ugh, I need a vacation.

Thank you all so much for the well wishes and words of encouragement.
I'll let you know when I get the results.

Cheers,

SP

Long live the fighters!

In 9 hours it shall be finished.

Dynamic

T-Minus

6 days 23 hours 47 minutes 50 seconds.

second chance by Louis Mckee

In my dream I return
to the place I went
wrong, and given this
chance to change
things, I go on
down the way I went
before. Even in sleep
I know there is only one go—
and it went well
the first time. Where
it didn't- well, it will
be good to see her again.

Heat Vision and Jack

This has to be one of the sweetest things I've ever seen. My friend told me about this and said that it's a failed pilot. I'm not sure, it might just be a spoof (especially since it says this is episode 14). Either way, it's freaking hilarious. It's about 30 minutes long, just to warn you.

Enjoy.

The onus of waiting

34 days 21 hours 49 minutes 06 seconds.
This is when the world will end.

Well, actually no, this is not Donnie Darko. This is the countdown to Qualifier 1. Many of you have heard of Q1 or at least of other departments prelims and the like. This is the test to end all tests. This is the test that will shade the color of my existence from here 'til kingdom come. I have been studying all summer and have become slightly burned out. My buddy, Tison, and I have taken most of this week off and it seems like an eternity. I can feel the formulas leaking from my head. I know that I need to get back on the horse, but I am so regretting this chore. May the gods of Statistics grant me serenity.